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I wanna be a pop star (James@War)
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JamesatWar makes a parody of the worst things about pop stars taking bits of information from many different famous singers gone out of hand.

I'm through with living in trailers with my pushy mom,
I'm only nine and she makes me put make-up on,
So I'll grant her her wish and I won't stop till I'm on TV

So tell me what you want

I want a brand new nose and a cleft in my chin
And some breast implants I'll deny I put in
And a teacup poodle that I'm always carrying with me.

Yeah, so what you need?

I'll need a good producer 'cause you know I can't sing
And a lawyer who can get me out of anything
Gonna date Justin Timberlake to gain some credibility.

Been there, done that

I want my own perfume and clothing line
It's all made in sweatshops, but that's just fine
I'll give the child labourers a signed copy of my CD
So how you gonna do it

I'm gonna reestablish the mouseketeers
Start my new life wearing those Mickey ears

'Cause we all just wanna be big popstars
Start out innocent to get my fanbase large
My listeners will be people in their tweens
And old perverts who can't wait till I turn eighteen
And my first hit will be a Disney song
But my good girl image won't last too long
My first album just had some innuendo
But by my third album I'll act like a full blown hoe, well
Hey, hey, I wanna be a pop star
Hey, hey, I wanna be a pop star

I wanna be generic, let the media lead me
Gonna sing canned music that my label feeds me
Oversaturate the market 'till everyone is sick of me

Oh, trust me, it'll happen

I'm gonna dress myself without an ounce of class,
Gonna make the boys all drool and stare at my... Glasses
Gonna hang out with the laughing stock of society

So how you gonna do it?

I'm gonna lose all sense of decency
And sell out all of my integrity

'Cause we all just wanna be big pop stars
Paparazzi gettin' pictures of my implant scars
I'll sleep through the days and party all night long
It's so hard to remember to put panties on
And my male fans will all be crushed
When those photos leak that haven't been airbrushed
I'll marry a loser who just wants my fame
And I'll divorce his sorry butt the very next day
And I'll drop a hint that I'm a lesbian
Hoping that'll jump start my lame career again
I'll pose for magazines like FHM and Marie Claire
Tell 'em 'bout how I'm a Christian in my underwear, well
Hey, hey, I wanna be a pop star

I'm gonna have some babies and then I'll neglect 'em
Hit my mid life crisis when I'm twenty seven
Make sure I'm drunk before I start to drive
Get caught lip syncing on Saturday Night Live

Well we all just wanna be big pop stars
Make abysmal movies and wreck fifteen cars
I'll check into rehab after hitting that tree
Then I'll check out early but be back next week
And they'll finally put me behind bars
With a real short sentence since I am a star
The tabloids will tell 'em that I've lost my flair
When the pressure gets too much well I'll just shave my hair
But I'll work hard to get my life on track
And my fans will all start to accept me back
I'm back on top and selling out my shows
Until my ex releases our sex videos... Well
Hey, hey, I wanna be a pop star
Hey, hey, I wanna be a pop star

I’M THROUGH WITH IT= I don’t want to do it anymore

PUSHY= someone who is pushy is always demanding your attention and wants to do better than anybody else

MON(AmE)= MUM(BrE) = mother. "Mon" with AmE accent sounds the same as "Mum" with BrE accent.

MAKE-UP= artificial colours that women put on their face to improve their beauty (well, at least that’s the idea)

GRANT= if you grant somebody a wish, you make that wish possible

I’LL GRANT HER HER WISH= the first HER is the indirect object of GRANT (I’ll grant her), and the second HER is the possessive adjective of the 3rd person singular feminine (her wish).

BRAND NEW= very very new

CLEFT= if you have a cleft in your chin, your chin has a little hollow. If that hollow is right on the edge, like a little indentation, it's a cleft, if it’s like a little hole between the edge and your lips, it’s a dimple (like in Kirk Douglas).

BREASTS= the big (sometimes) fatty parts women have on their chests to feed babies (etc)
BREAST IMPLANTS= silicone padding which is introduced inside a woman’s breasts to make them look bigger

I’LL DENY I PUT IN= I will say I didn’t put breasts implants in my breasts

A TEACUP POODLE= a little breed of dog with curly hair, usually white

GONNA= I’m going to

DATE= if you date someone, you go out with them as boyfriend and girlfriend

SWEATSHOPS= a small factory where many people work together in poor conditions and for a very low salary

MOUSEKETEERS= a group of children appearing on the television program The Mickey Mouse Club in the 1950's, wearing the later famous Mickey Mouse big ears (as a kind of hat)

WANNA= want to

‘CAUSE= because

FANBASE= the faithful group of admirers of a particular pop singer, sports team etc

PEOPLE IN THEIR TWEENS= people between 20 and 29 years old

INNUENDO= An indirect or subtle, usually derogatory implication in an expression; an insinuation (in this context it refers to sex innuendos)

HOE= A promiscuous woman. Someone who doesn’t mind having sex with lots of people. A full blown hoe is a very promiscuous woman.

GENERIC= if you are generic you are very famous and everybody knows you

CANNED= (AmE) canned food is food sold inside a metal can, so that it lasts for a long time. In BrE it is usually "tinned" food (we use "tin" for food and "can" for drinks)

MY LABEL= my music company

OVERSATURATE= to saturate to excess

EVERYONE IS SICK OF ME= everyone is tired of me

TRUST ME= believe me

WITHOUT AN OUNCE OF CLASS= with no taste at all (very ugly)

DROOL= to let saliva run from your mouth

STARE= to look directly and fixedly, often with eyes wide open. The song says "gonna make the boys all drool and stare at my...", and we expect a word to rhyme with CLASS (from the previous line), and in this context everybody would think of "ass", which is a colloquial word for your bottom (BrE "arse"), a bit rude. But instead, he says "glasses", which doesn’t rhyme well with "class" (so we know he avoided using the rude word, but it’s already in our minds... too late)

HANG OUT= if you hang out with friends, you go out with them to have fun

THE LAUGHING STOCK= something or someone that is ridiculed by everyone else and is often well-known only because it is so ridiculous and so bad it's funny

PAPARAZZI= pronounced "paparatsi". An Italian plural word (singular: paparazzo). A paparazzo is a freelance photographer who doggedly pursues celebrities to take hidden pictures for sale to magazines and newspapers.

SCAR= a mark left on the skin after a surface injury or wound has healed

PARTY ALL NIGHT LONG= I will have fun all the night (in a private house, in bars or anywhere else)

PANTIES= underwear worn by women (under their clothes)

CRUSHED= overexcited

I’LL DIVORCE HIS SORRY BUTT= I’ll divorce him, the poor man. "Butt" means "ass, bottom", but in coll. AmE people often use "butt" to mean "person" (I don’t want to see your butt near me again = I don’t ever want to see you around)

TO DROP A HINT= say something ambiguous that make people think

LAME= a lame person can’t walk properly. A lame career is a career that goes badly

TELL’EM’BOUT= tell them about

NEGLECT= don’t look after them properly, don’t pay proper attention to them

LIP SYNCE= to sing in playback

LIVE= pronounced /laɪv/. Transmitted at the time of performance, rather than being pre-recorded.

WANNA= want to

ABYSMAL= (of movies, songs, etc.) of a terrible quality

WRECK= if you wreck a car, you crash them (as in an accident)

REHAB= a rehabilitation centre for drug-addicts or alcoholics

PUT ME BEHIND BARS= send me to prison

SENTENCE= a court judgment, especially a judicial decision of the punishment to be inflicted on a person found guilty

TABLOIDS= newspapers of small format giving the news in condensed form, usually with illustrated, often sensational material (not serious)

FLAIR= natural talent or style

TO GET MY LIFE ON TRACK= to get my life back to normal, the way it should be


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