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The sketch presents the 90th birthday of elderly upper-class Englishwoman, Miss Sophie, who hosts a dinner every year for her close friends Mr Pommeroy, Mr Winterbottom, Sir Toby, and Admiral von Schneider to celebrate the occasion. (Note that the plot has nothing to do with New Year's Eve, as it is often incorrectly stated. There is a "Happy new year" toast, but this is purely a reference to Miss Sophie's anniversary.) The problem is that given Miss Sophie's considerable age, she has outlived all of her friends, and so her equally aged manservant James makes his way around the table, impersonating each of the guests in turn.
Miss Sophie decides on appropriate drinks to accompany the menu of the evening, consisting of Mulligatawny soup (Miss Sophie orders sherry), North Sea haddock (with white wine), chicken (with champagne), and fruit for dessert (with port) served by James, and so he finds himself raising (and emptying) his glass four times per course. That takes its toll, increasingly noticeable in James' growing difficulty in pouring the drinks, telling wine glasses from vases of flowers, and refraining from bursting into song. Even before the alcohol begins to exert its influence, he has trouble avoiding the head of a tiger skin laying on the floor between the dinner table and the buffet.
The crucial exchange during every course is:
James: The same procedure as last year, Miss Sophie?
Miss Sophie: The same procedure as every year, James!
After the dinner, Miss Sophie indicates to a very drunk James that she wishes to retire to bed, to which James responds:
James: By the way, the same procedure as last year, Miss Sophie?
Miss Sophie (delightedly): The same procedure as every year, James!
James: Well, I'll do my very best!
James: Good evening, Miss Sophie, good evening.
Miss Sophie:Good evening, James.
James:You are looking very well this evening, Miss Sophie.
Miss Sophie: Well, I am feeling very much better, thank you, James.
James:Good, good.
Miss Sophie: Well, I must say that everything looks nice.
James: Thank you very much, Miss Sophie, thank you.
Miss Sophie: Is everybody here?
James: Indeed, they are, yeah. Yes...They are all here for your anniversary, Miss Sophie.
Miss Sophie: All five places are laid out?
James: All laid out as usual.
Miss Sophie: Sir Toby?
James: Sir Toby, yes, he's sitting here this year, Miss Sophie.
Miss Sophie: Admiral von Schneider?
James: Admiral von Schneider is sitting here, Miss Sophie.
Miss Sophie: Mr. Pommeroy?
James: Mr. Pommeroy I put round here for you.
Miss Sophie: And my very dear friend, Mr. Winterbottom?
James: On your right, as you requested, Miss Sophie!
Miss Sophie: Thank you, James. You may now serve the soup.
James: The soup, thank you very much, Miss Sophie, thank you. They are all waiting for you. Little drop of mulligatawny soup, Miss Sophie?
Miss Sophie: I am particularly fond of mulligatawny soup, James.
James: Yes, I know you are.
Miss Sophie: I think we'll have sherry with the soup.
James: Sherry with the soup, yes... Oh, by the way, the same procedure as last year, Miss Sophie?
Miss Sophie: Same procedure as every year, James.
James: Same procedure as every year, James...
Miss Sophie: Is that a dry sherry, James?
James: Yes, a very dry sherry, Miss Sophie... very dry. Straight out of the cellar, this morning, Miss Sophie.
Miss Sophie: Sir Toby!
James: Cheerio, Miss Sophie!
Miss Sophie: Admiral von Schneider!
James: Ad... Must I say it this year, Miss Sophie?
Miss Sophie: Just to please me, James.
James: Just to please you. Very good, yes, yes... Skol!
Miss Sophie: Mr. Pommeroy!
James: Happy New Year, Sophie!
Miss Sophie: And dear Mr. Winterbottom!
James: Well, here we are again, old lovely...
Miss Sophie: You may now serve the fish.
James: Fish. Very good, Miss Sophie. Did you enjoy the soup?
Miss Sophie: Delicious, James.
James: Thank you, Miss Sophie, glad you enjoyed it. Little bit of North Sea haddock, Miss Sophie.
Miss Sophie: I think we'll have white wine with the fish.
James: White wine with the fish? The same procedure as last year, Miss Sophie?
Miss Sophie: The same procedure as every year, James!
James: Yeah...
Miss Sophie: Sir Toby!
James: Cheerio, Miss Sophie, me gal...
Miss Sophie: Admiral von Schneider!
James: Oh, must I, Miss Sophie?
Miss Sophie: James, please, please...
James: Skol!
Miss Sophie: Mr. Pommeroy!
James: Happy New Year, Sophie gal!
Miss Sophie: Mr. Winterbottom!
James: You look younger than ever, love! Younger than ever! Ha, ha, ha...
Miss Sophie: Please serve the chicken!
James: Ya ...
Miss Sophie: That looks a very fine bird!
James: That's a lovely chu ... chuk ... chicken, that I'll tell you, a lovely ...
Miss Sophie: I think we'll have champagne with the bird!
James: Champagne, ya... Sssssame, same procedure as last year, Miss Sophie?
Miss Sophie: The same procedure as every year, James!
James: Sophie, me gal ...
Miss Sophie: Admiral von Schneider!
James: Must I, Miss Sophie?
Miss Sophie: James!
James: Schkolll!
Miss Sophie: Mr. Pommeroy!
James: Happy New Year, Sophie, gal...
Miss Sophie: Mr. Winterbottom!
James: It's one of the nicest little woman... hic... one of the nicest little woman, that's ever breathed, that's ever breathed... I now declare this bazaar opened! Would you like some fruit?
Miss Sophie: I think we'll have port with the fruit!
James: Oh, ... no! S...ame procedure as last...
Miss Sophie: Yes, the same procedure as last year, James!
James: ..............................!!!
Miss Sophie: Sir Toby!
James: Sugar in the morning, sugar...
Miss Sophie: Admiral von Schneider!
James: Schkolll!
Miss Sophie: Mr. Pommoroy!
James: I'm sorry, Madam, sorry.
Miss Sophie: Mr. Winterbottom!
James: Huuuhhh, I'll kill that cat!
Miss Sophie: Well, James, it's been a wonderful party!
James: Well, it's been most enjoyable.
Miss Sophie: I think I'll retire.
James: You're going to bed?
Miss Sophie: Yes.
James: Sit down, I'll give you a hand up, Madam.
Miss Sophie: As I was saying, I'll retire...
James: Ya... ya. By the way, the same procedure as last year, Miss Sophie?
Miss Sophie: The same procedure as every year James!
James: Well, I'll do my very best!
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